YOU MUST WATCH THIS

So,every man, woman, child, yeti, jedi knight, zombie, headless horseman, glee club member, and everyone of any other obscure label should watch this. It is, hands down, the most epic work of genius created by anyone. Darren Ciss (Harry) wrote, directed, and stars in it. He is god.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmwM_AKeMCk

Enjoy. You can thank me once you get through all 20+ parts. Trust me, it's worth it. Oh, and I have the legit soundtrack if anyone is interested....let's just say I know a guy.

Hamonica Boy Strikes Again. FML

So, today I got a ride back from break with everyone's favorite harmonica-playing asshole. Why? Because I enjoy torture and I know how much you all enjoyed our last adventure. Sorry folks, never again. NEVER. "Why?" You ask concernedly, knowing full well that I'm going to tell you. Well let me tell you. Car ride begins, around four with the usual uncertianty about a time frame followed by a phone call giving me a roughly ten minute heads up. Which I am used to by now and was fully ready and packed, stuff by the door, don't worry. Then, I get the oh-so-joyous news that we are gaining a passenger on our jubillent ride-one, John, tech ed guy 'soft spoken and like a hippie' whose girl friend is 'ugly,' 'redneck' and 'has him whipped, don't tell him I said that.' Folks, I can't make this shit up. So we journey and extra hour-oh yes, the fun is extended for three hours rather than the usual wonderful two. I get to be navigator because he dosn't know where he's going and forgot his glasses. But he's doing it, so between the two of us (John and I) he can make a profit and buy beer. Now, if that doesn't give you an idea of the classy kind of guy he is then I don't know what will. But I digress. Here we are navigating through Burks county, him smokin' like a fucking chimmney as he questions me about the partys at school and recounts his own drinking/smoking exploits. We're also jammin out (no harmonica yet, but later) to some Elvis-Costello, not Presley. This small snippit is a exerpt of our limited conversation:

"Now we're gonna listen to some Elvisssss-"
"-Oh, cool. Love Elvis-"
"-Costelloooooo."
"Oh....I don't really know his stuff..."
"Yeah, I like him cause he sings songs about killing girls."
"Oh. I feel like this is the part where I should make a run for it..."
"Yeaaahhh....let's take a drive into the woooods huh???"

I think you can guess who said what. So we get to John's house, where we wait as HB has to get out and check out the 'forge' that John has in his garage and HB talks about how he can hook John up with some cheap propane. WTF? Anyway, HB needs his coffee and proceeds to curse out the town for not having a Starbucks and we end up at the good ol' golden arches. HB orders two double cheeseburgers (yes, people, that's FOUR burgers. Which, I don't know if you know this, but it's MURDER on the bowels....) and tries to order an extra shot of expresso....IN HIS MCDONALS COFFEE. Which confuses the guy taking his order.  HB then continues to play the role of just general asshole customer, inching up a little too far at the window...hitting on the cashier chick, etc. He then asks for them to throw away his Red Bull can, which they can't do? (company policy apperently?) so, when she closes the window, he throws the can at the window and hauls ass out of there. Oh, and he also takes this oppurtunity to share with us that he was once arrested for throwing a hamburger AT A KID. 'But the charges were dropped. Assault with a hamburger weapon. HA.'

CLASSY.

So we continue along on our merry trek, a mere hour has passed, and here we are with HB and his incessent farting, John and his fucking bird? Yes. I said bird, as in he is traveling with a bird in a covered cage on his lap. Which HB at one point says he hopes the bird dies so his car will be haunted by an animal spirit. And there's me. Who by this point is sending HELP ME texts to like everyone. I almost sent one to my own mother. Oh, and he's also calling me "spads" (as in, rhymes with 'fads') because I'm pretty sure he forgot my name while introducing me to John and so he called me by my last name, which he then shortened to "spads." As follows:

"Spads...yeah."
"No, you don't actually call me that...that didn't happen. And isn't. You can call me Spade. That's acceptable."
"Nah, that's like dark. Spades are a symbol of death....(which, has some truth to it, I googled it...)"
"Ummm...or they're a shovel."
"Or they're something you use on your dog."

Silence ensued. For a good while. So, as is usual when silence ensues, he plays with the radio. Among other songs, we listened to 'the penis song' about having a large penis which chases away sadness, the pokemon theme song, and snoop dogg superimposed over kirby. Also featured, Asian rock. Including the song from the Wii comercials. By hour two I'm ready to throw myself from the car. The next hour is pretty similar, I'll leave it at that. Oh, and the harmonica is back too, the same riff over and over and over to every song. WONDERFUL. And you know the best way to appreciate harmonica? With a migrane being choked to death via secondhand smoke. It's soooo much better that way!

Long story short, his parting remark (right before moaning "moooooooooooooooooooooooooneyyyyy." at me as soon as he put the car in park) was this (as I argued women could drive dispite the fact they weren't in NASCAR-which isn't actually driving....any child who can turn a wheel can do that) was this:

"So, I was talking to a girl in a bar the other night and she was like 'yeah I'm majoring in sociology and like feminism or feminists or whatever-"
"Gender studies"
"-yeah. And I was like 'Oh, so you're majoring in being a bitch.'"

Phun With Photos

So, I was looking through the photos on my phone and realized 90% of them are either pictures taken by me for this blog or pictures sent to me by people so I can put them on the blog. My memory card is rapidly filling up so I decided that a random photo gallery was needed. I call it "Spotted Around My Life" Please enjoy, and remember, feel free to send in anything awesome/funny/odd you see either around campus or around your life!

"The Wooden Shoe"

My favorite Anarchist Bookstore, the Wooden Shoe. Located on South Street, for my fellow anti-governmental readers.

"Swords for Spirits"

Also on South Street, the Occult Store, well equipt with all the potions, powders, talismans, and spirit swords you'll need to battle your own personal demons. Who needs Quest Week therapy sessions?










"Fat Booty"

Gotta love Philly Graffiti. And it's fat booty apperently.

"If this Homemade Dark Mark Doesn't Convince You..."

Yes, it's official, I am once again a proud member of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named's most elite. Although he was a little more eager to get Molly Weasley to sign up....

"Damitri Martin is an Okay Comedian"

The statement above is false, he's pretty freaking funny. And this was just some DM-inspired graffiti on the desk next to me in psycholoy. Ps. I'm trying to start a graffiti-off with the girl I share a desk with but so far all she's done is tell me my drawings are 'cute' ugh.

"Amish Love"

This corn was left for me on my birthday by my Amish secret admirer. Although I don't know how he got in without using the electric card scanners....

Turkey Day and the Triumphant Return of the Blog

     So, I feel like I've tried starting blogs before, because I distinctly remember writing a very touching and emotional Thanksgiving entry about how we should appreciate all we have, the good food, the love of our families, the reuniting of long-absent friends, etc. I remain a firm believer in this, more so especially since college and I've been separated from all three. And although absence makes the heart grow fonder, it can also clarify things. As a small aside, I am currently learning to read Tarot cards and should warn you that the past hour spent reading my guidebook is leaving my writing profoundly cryptic and pensive. I apologize for the weirdness. But hey, I'm writing aren't I?

 

     Poor Thanksgiving, the forgotten child of the holidays, wedged in-between the aftermath of Halloween tummy aches and the pre-Christmas shopping frenzy. I mean, one could argue that Turkey Day has been reduced to nothing but the green light for the Christmas season. Every year the day after Thanksgiving marks the acceptable day to wake up at the ass-crack of dawn to shop like a maniac, put up your plastic Santas and obnoxious blow-up lawn decorations, and readjust all the radios in your house to a station that plays Christmas music 24/7 so that when you finally get to Christmas the mere sound of "Jingle Bells" makes you want to punch a baby. And then there's Thanksgiving. The holiday without any songs or intense decorations, whose main point is to hunt down and mercilessly slay a turkey (which, btw: turkeys are so ugly I think of this more as putting them out of their misery) while stuffing our faces full of everything good in the world until we can't move and need to run out on Black Friday just to buy jeans that fit. I mean, in all the madness, who remembers to give thanks? I know I usually don't- well at least, not until the last slice of pumpkin pie has made its way safely into someone’s stomach. But in reality, I have so much to be thankful for, and so much of it goes unacknowledged 364 days of the year, and then Thanksgiving guilt trips me into remembering. Although you may not be reading this on Thanksgiving, take a second, pause, and think of all the stuff you've forgotten to be thankful for. Here are some suggestions that may have slipped your mind:

• Good roommates (or good roommates soon)
• The fact that Taylor Lutner is shirtless for a good portion of "New Moon"
•  Access to a car, Target, family, clean drinking water, and camcorders for Skype
• citationsmachine and Sparknotes
• Cleaning ladies and/or mothers
• Good music and books
• The element of surprise
• Freedom from persecution or discrimination due to age, race, gender, or religion (and eventually sexual orientation, though we're not there yet).
• Sewing machines
• The random kindness of strangers
• Public transportation that runs
• Imagination, which gives us the ability to turn something incredibly shitting into something lovely or hilarious
• Elevators (for those of us who may be in very tall dorm buildings)
• JK Rowling
• Bug spray

     Just a few ideas you may have missed in addition to the obvious (friends, family, good fortune, opportunity for education, shelter, clothing, food, etc.). And with than I close this particular entry, but don't worry, I'll be back, in my hiatus I've found a wealth of pictures, videos, and lessons to share, so sit tight. But for now, hug your parents, send nice texts to your friends, be nice to your siblings, stuff your face with leftovers, and have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand I'm back. For A Little While Anyway.

Recently I learned:

• Why I never trust other people with my projects (well, I was reminded actually).
• That sometimes you do use what you learned in high school.
• Sometimes that random knowlege that you thought you were never going to need again will totally come in handy when trying to impress professors....
• That while in REM sleep your muscles are paralyzed, unless you're weird and they're not which leads to sleep talking and walking (ASHLEY! haha).
• That procrastination is a terrible, terrible thing.
• With blood, sweat, and tears it is possible to do four weeks of art homework in approx. four days.
• I would not recomend the above to even my worst foes.
• My seven year old cousin thinks I'm old because I go to college.
• Drunk people don't take too kindly to people (*cough* JennyFromTheBlock *cough*) yelling things like "555-GET LOST" at them when they ask for your number.
• People driving through campus at 2am are INSANE.
• Swans like faux-reos.
• My friends have the most adorable parents.
• More or less all of the people I know watch Glee. Which makes sense, because I know people with good taste.
• People remember all the random shit that I talk/blog/complain about, even when I don't.
• In total I have eight All American Rejects, Amberlin, and Taking Back Sunday songs on my iPod.
• Art Ed majors have a drawing potion of the PRAXIS II.
• Amtrack is a bitch.
• The real Michael Cera might be partying at Drexel as a promotional thing....omg.
• Looking good on a Monday morning is frowned upon in college.
• I accidentally had my razor (like, for my legs people, don't be alarmed) in my pocket all of psych class. Why? I have no idea...
• Wellness is a stupid class.
• I can make it to the art building, and back, and to the art building again in under ten minutes (this was not a pleasent fact to learn).
• Nothing feels better than being done with a particularly stressful day.
• But finding out a project deadline has been pushed back comes in close second for best feeling ever.
• Screw Google Calandar, I just went DIY on it's ass.
• The vending mechine needs better 'midnight munchie' food....like french fries.
• RAY-J IS LEAVING!!!!!!!!!!!! WTF

In conclusion, late night, lots of sketching, brain is dead, no metors tonight, concert tomorrow, more work. Peace and blessins' to all. Stay awesome. G'night.

Adventures in the 2-1-5

Hey all, I'm back from a huge ass blog-break. Since last blogging I took an adventure back to the hometown, skipped my first class, turned 19, had my immune system die on me, annnnnnnd had several epic reunions. Kinda swamped these past few weeks (and up coming week) but I know you all anxiously await my blog posts (all two of you readers). Anyway, since I last posted I learned:

• Glee is the greatest show. EVER.
• Men can be ladies too.
• Health services is much less scary than a real doctor's office, and they're nicer!
• Skipping class is much easier on the consious if you sleep through it.
• 1 minute of reading Cosmo = 2 minutes of playing Halo (to keep your guy-quotent up).
• The guys hall still smells like ass. I haven't been there in awhile, I thought maybe something had changed?
• I now have an option other than Harmonica Boy to get home!
• I have a secret Amish admirer who left me corn for my birthday!
• Some people cannot recognise my handwriting even after 10 years of friendship.
• I miss high school.
• I also miss quality Chinese food.
• That when you sneeze (which I've been doing so much lately) your heart skips a beat, which is why people say 'God Bless You!'
• I have been dubbed 'Becca of the Freshman.'
• I'm not the only one who has missed exits because they were rocking out to showtunes too hard.
• I now have three phone twins!
• (More) random people read my blog.
• Registration is not that hard, granted you are in the honors college. Ahh the perks of Diehm.
• All of the sophomores are going to the midnight premire of Twilight too...
• Though Kirt is my favorite character on Glee, Artie will probably have the best one liner EVER.
• Showtunes get stuck in my head way too easily.
• GW cast parties never change. And I mean it, like you still run into the same people at every one, even though they graduated...
• I love my mommy (this is one of those 'I just re-realised this' things).
• Glow sticks are the shit.
• Nothing beats good (familiar, non-UD) food with good friends...<3

Other than that, keeping a blog is hard work! Yeah right, I'm just super lazy, but like I said, I'm going to be blogging less frequently so please enjoy this video clip (if you haven't already) because everyone needs to see Tracy....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtkU2ch0sRI

New Celeb Spotting! And an apology....

So, yet again, JennyFromTheBlock hath sent me a lovely picture (I now outsource my creeping) of one of our favorite celeb look-alikes....

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE'S Corbin!

Also, an apology for not blogging, I will soon I promise! It's been insanity with going home, class registration, schoolwork, birthday, planning things, New Moon....ugh! So expect more soon, The longer I wait to blog the more I'll likely have to say! And don't forget, SEND ME PICTURES/AWKWARD CONVOS/ANYTHING really, and I'll probably post it. G'night all, and see you at 6AM sharp to register for classes! FML!

New Segment: Heard Around Campus!

I always thought I should do this, seeing as I have some similar posts and seeing as I am an evesdropping, stalker creep according to some people (*cough* DAN *cough*) although those some people still complain I don't blog enough....but I digress. So though I've heard a few that I thought were good at the moment, I've forgotten them. But now, thanks to a guest submission by GlindatheGood, I have been forced to create this segment. This quote is to great to not tell the world. As always people, guest submissions are welcomed, nay, ENCOURAGED! You get to see your (code)name in print and you get all the associated glory! So, here goes (thank you GTG for this!!):

Overheard @ the Galley by some random guy in line:

"You know that Josh Grobin song that makes you orgasm every time you hear it?"

Speech Ideas

So, I've been hearing a lot about how horrible Honors Speech will be for me next semester, seeing as the majority of my hall is currently enrolled and how it has single handedly reduced sleep in Diehm by 78%. So, in order to attempt to restrict the hold the dreaded class will have on me I've decided to brainstorm some ideas for topics:

• Why Valentine’s Day should be banned as a holiday (if you love someone you should show them every day...
• Why Pokémon was completely ruined after they expanded from the original 150.
• Why JK Rowling should/should not have written the epilogue after Deathly Hallows (I'll have to re-re-re-re-read it before passing judgment).
• Why Jacob Black is a marginally better choice for Bella than Edward Cullen is.
• Why Uggs are not only the cause of 78% of heinous fashion crimes but should also be banned due to misuse by sluts.
• Why leggings should not function as pants (unless a dire emergency occurs mid-changing, a shirt worn with leggings should AT MINIMUS come to mid-thigh. Don't even fight me on this, I know I'm right).
• Why Eowen is nothing but a home wrecking slut in LOTR (take that Peas-n-Carrots!).
• Why all people should go through a mid-life Quest, rather than a mid-life crisis.
• Why schools should eliminate nomathetic testing.
• Why schools should keep art programs despite budget cuts.
• Why creamy peanut butter is far superior to chunky (point one: Johnny Depp prefers creamy, check out Secret Window).
• Why living at college (if possible) is a great experience, and staying on weekends as much as possible adds marginally to that.
• Why everyone should read the Harry Potter series.
• Why we should start charging people to use plastic bags.
• Why we should stop wasting money on Smartboards in schools, seeing as they are (mostly) useless.
• Why Ms. Rowling should have kept her big, fat (genius) mouth shut about Dumbledore's sexual orientation.
• Why cleaning ladies are hired.
• Why rain boots should be standard issue here.

There are just a few of my many ideas. If anyone has any suggestions, I'm starting a list now because from the looks of it I'm going to need all the help I can get next semester...

WOW: Word of the Week

Brothel noun (bro-thul): It's like a regular brothel, but all the clients and employees are dudes. Bro-Thul

ex: I heard one of the bros in Beta House couldn't afford tuition last quarter and had to make up the difference by working facedown at the brothel over in Castro.
\
Oh man Diehmers, guess we weren't the first to think of this one....

I'm baaaaaaaaaaack

I feel like every post begins with "so I haven't posted in awhile..." so henceforth, I'm not going to write that anymore. Instead I'm going to assume that by now you've figured out I'm not posting daily anymore. Which really makes little to no difference, seeing as I can only assume very few of you check my blog daily. So, now that we straightened that out, I'm prefacing this by saying that this post isn't going to be very long, because my unrealistic goal for the evening is to be in bed by 11:30. Fat chance, I know, but I can dream. Today I learned:

• Some guys think that winter hats with ears are cute. Personally I just think that it makes them look even creepier when they're walking unusually close behind you.
• Prank wars are not easily stopped, sadly.
• Cygnyts, dispite the fact that it is an ice cream place, has katsup packets readily available?
• Halloween is a wonderful holiday.
• That I should start playing Kingdom Hearts?
• Amtrack customer service is not as evil as I would have predicted.
• Scheduling is a bitch.
• Henna tattoos are the shit. I actually knew this already, but figured I'd point it out to anyone who has never gotten one; do it!
• I can mail things from the RA's desk!
• Guys have way more time on their hands than I would have ever thought.
• 'Polyanna' meaning a secret gift exchange (ex. a secret santa) is not as common of a word as I thought.

Other than that, I'd like to let everyone know that I A. am in the midst of an inter-room prank war and B. may or may not be getting a ride back from the weekend this weekend with everyone's favorite harmonica-playing car buddy....

Peace out cub scouts.

Back from the Weekend @ Home

Things (literally objects) I Missed From Home:

• Normal toilet paper rolls
• My sewing mechine
• A clean, hairless shower
• My craft supplies
• A car
• Cable TV, with a legit guide
• Tortilla chips
• A couch that doesn't look like it belongs in a doctor's waiting room
• Halloween decorations
• Legit plates and cups
• Radio
• My Yes to Carrots shampoo
• Wireless Internet (that actually runs quickly)
• The matress topper on my bed at home

Things I Hate (which have been further accentuated by this weekend)

• Short weekends
• Rain
• Amtrack
• Yetis
• Short weekends
• Leaving my family :(

So, yet again, I have been bested by public transportion. Let's just say the people at Amtrack will be getting a very frustrated phone call sometime tomorrow...Seriously? How does a train rail just break? And what kind of a station only has one track anyway!? People need to travel places! Not all of us have horses and buggies that we can just hitch up on a whim!! Thank goodness for amazing roommates though....<3<3<3

On another note (in case you haven't figured it out, this entry is just a random mod-podge of things) only 364 days until next halloween!! I love halloween and am in love with this years costume!! I missed my sewing mechine so bad! It and I had a bittersweet reunion Friday night and Saturday morning as a whipped up my questly elf costume complete with semi-movie accurate elven cloak (with pointed hood, very useful in rain) and Leaf of Lorian <3. New goal: find somewhere else to wear that outfit to. Hell, I'd wear it around campus, it'd be totally legit with maybe a cardigin in place of the cloak.

All in all, I miss home but am lovin' the college life. Disney movies and Smash Brothers make me smile, the Phillies make me frown. Chocolate Chip Peanut Butter muffins make me happy, Wellness exams first thing on a Monday make me want to weep bitter tears. Take the good with the bad. Take the wins with the loses (Phils, you're excluded, WINS ONLY FROM NOW ON) and carpe die(h)m.