Thursday, April 7, 2011

Games I Learned At College

Don't worry, this isn't what you think. Mom, Grammy, you can keep reading, don't worry. These are just some of the games I've learned to play being a college kid.
  • Chivialry Yahtzee: This game is played by walking behind one or more people while your arms are full of food, books, packages or other assorted large unwieldy objects. You try and guess whether or not the people/person in front of you will wait and hold the door or make you stand (most likely in the rain, cause people rarely hold doors in the rain) and fumble blindly and one-handedly in your pocket for your ID card to get into your dorm.
  • French Fry Jenga: This is also a game played when your hands are full. When walking back from somewhere (usually Late Night) with a bunch of food in your hands, and you're STARVING and you REALLY REALLY want that french fry on top of the pile on top of all the food your holding so you use your tongue/lips to maneuver that single fry out from the pile of fries and into your mouth without A. tumbling the pile B. dropping fries or C. having fry fall down your cleavage. Sorry to say I've lost this game a few times...
  • YouTube Scramble: This is the stupid, shorter name for a game I like to call "How-Many-Games-of-Tetris-Can-I-Play-Before-This-Video-Loads." Self-explanatory
  • That's All I Got In the Fridge: Sprinkle sprankle bitches.
  • Did I Wear This Last Class?: Yeah, I hate laundry. And if you wear layers, sometimes you can get away with the top shirt twice. Don't judge me, I know you've done it.
  • Bus Bingo: This is when I just kinda saunter off to the mall/the city/Goodwill/the movies without really actually looking to see when there are buses and just pray that there's another one coming.
  • But I Had a Reason! This is when you sit down, sign off Facebook, disconnect your Internet and get pumped for some hardcore working time, and then you realize that you absolutely had to [insert something you "need" Internet/facebook for here]. Then you end up spending 40 more minutes on Facebook/YouTube/Skype/Stumbleupon/CollegeHumor/this blog before you actually start your homework.
  • Don't Wake Roomate!: A classic, that's even more high-stakes if you're an insomniac whose sleep schedule is three hours off from the rest of the world (who, me?)
  • New Class Clue: This is when you get stuck in some class where you literally know no one and the proff makes you pick groups or partners on the very first day. So you have to eye up everyone around you and evaluate their intelligence, group work ability, commuter-status, personality and general usefulness in one glance and then calculate how best to not-awkwardly ask them to be partners. [Note: variations of this game include "You're the best looking in this class, let's work together" and "I-Spy the Class Workaholic. Partners?"]
  • Registration-opoly: Players must weigh the benefits of a great prof vs the inconvenience of an 8am class! Try and get a set of classes in all the same building in a row so you don't have to walk back-and-forth!
  • InconvienceLand: Nothing like it's jolly counterpart (true life: there's no Queen Frostine in the real world), this game occurs when you need to know something about hours, services on campus, regulations, etc. All you have to do is ask yourself the question "Would it be convenient?" If the answer to that question is 'yes', the answer to your original query is 'no'. [Note: I can only vouch for this game's accuracy at my school, but with 50% budget cuts, the rest of the PA schools might get better at this game soon enough]
  • Bidd-I-Spy: You can pretty much play this one anywhere. Basically, grab a window seat or lawn chair by housing on a Thursday, Friday or Saturday night (PSU: any night works for you) and watch the Uggs/leggings/Northfaces roll on by in droves. Play with your friends by making bets on how early into spring semester you'll start seeing bare legs again (my money's on February).