Today's Quest: Fitting All This S**t Back Into My Room

Dear Future Krysti,


I would like to go over a few things that I think you should know about the process of moving in and out of college, so I'd like to recap a few lessons I've learned. But firstly, do not ever think as poorly of your past fashion sense until you look back at your middle school pictures. Trust me, I just cleaned all that shit out of the back of our closet and nothing I am wearing now or ever will wear will be as absolutely horrible as what I wore in seventh, eighth, and even some of ninth grade. Now, to some extent we can blame that on our sheltered uniform wearing catholic school days, far from anything trendy, but really, adolescent us was a hot mess. Moving on to more pressing matters, please do not hang massive amounts of small random papers all over your dorm room walls, because as cool as you think you're being, it will cost you two hours of your life taking it all down. Also, if you insist on doing this anyway (which I know you will) use tak and not tape, it's soooo wasteful and everything rips. Also, you need to stop accumulating clothes ASAP cause I just cleaned out and donated two bags of your crap and we still have no room for all my college stuff. Really girl, it's kind of an issue. Thanks for your assume cooperation (which I know I won't have) and hope that I stay as super-awesome in the future. See ya soon. xoxox


-Present Krysti


List of Things Found While Cleaning (Which Tell the Story of My Life)

• One (1) pair of Spock/elf ears
• Four (4) inflatable yellow and red rafts
• One (1) Pacman belt buckle
• Two (2) wands, one with Spellotape one without
• One (1) pair of Vans sneakers bought in eighth grade when they were all the rage
• One (1) pair of light up heels circa ninth grade
• Twenty (20) hair scrunchies from before I discovered hair ties
• Six (6) of my Harry Potter books, year 4 still missing
• One (1) pair of lacy fingerless Bellatrix gloves
• Fifteen (15) shoe boxes in various conditions
• One (1) pair of prematurely retired green Vans
• Two (2) shirts that I completely forgot existed
• One (1) mate-less blue flip-flop
• A massive amount of high school art projects which I have nowhere to put
• One (1) pair of fierce yellow heels that will see the light of day once more

And this was only the bottom half of one closet. I have four. This should be a fun couple of weeks...