Just a Hot Second of Your Time...For My Sake

So, I don't claim to be super 1000% politically involved at all times, but I try and do my part to the things closest to my heart (the environment, gay rights, education reform, you know, that liberal agenda stuff). And this issue is not only close to my heart its actually the solid my heart lives on 9 months out of the year, the soil many of the people close to my heart live on, and the solid under thousands of deserving, wonderful people. PA state government is proposing budget cuts to higher education, in some reports by up to 50%. Now, I don't know if you knew this, but I go to a PA state school (so if you like me or my blog, right there is enough reason to sign). Not only that, cutting school funding in times of economic stress is THE WORST thing you can do. Hmm, to get ourselves out of recession lets make sure that the next generation of citizens is even more incompetent, uneducated and lazy! Great idea! Anyway, I'll hop off my soap box in the hopes that if you're cool enough to have found this blog, and you're awesome enough to stick with me that you value my education and the education of hundreds of thousands of others across the state who deserve (and in many cases work their ass off to afford and to get) a good education. The online petition can be found here:

http://coalitionpastudents.com/signpetition.html

There's also a group on facebook, so if you care, sign. If you care a lot, sign and send it to all your friends/family/pseudo-facebook friends/everyone you know. Thanks kiddles for helping change the world, one rambly blog post at a time.

Guilty Pleasures

Alright, I'm kinda grasping at straws here for material, so here's the best GLaDOS could come up with in terms of topics. Since he's too chicken to write a guest post (oh yeah bitch, gauntlet hath been thrown) this is what I'm writing...

Guilty Pleasures

a la Krysti

1. Terrible pop music (Ke$ha, I'm lookin' at you...)
2. Starburst jellybeans
3. "Sonny with a Chance" on Disney Channel (THAT SHOW IS SO FUCKING GREAT DON'T EVEN GIMME SHIT)
4. Pretending I can sing
5. Dressing in costume (if you consider this 'guilty')
6. Eating leftovers late at night
7. Buying Converses on ridiculous sale
8. Tetris
9. Writing fan-fic (back in the day, back in the day.....) 
10. Reading fan fic
11. "Say Yes to the Dress"
12. The Jonas Brothers
13. Fan art
14. Wearing fake earrings (once in a while I like the look of myself with cartilage piercings...and Claire's sells great falsies)
15. SUGARBOWL
16. "Glee" (if you consider this 'guitly')
17. Buying tshirts with stupid sayings on them
18. Writing this blog

I never really realized how much of what I do could be considered a 'guilty pleasure.' Granted much of this is not that 'guilty' and I'm not really ashamed of most of it (possible exception #9) but I needed it to bulk up mah list a little. And hell, if you wanna get it off your chest, comment with a guilty pleasure annonomously becuase I'm an attention whore deep down and I yern for your comments to validate my existance.

Thoughts from the Basement

So, I feel like at this point, our society has differentiated being 'grown up' from being a 'real person.' Think about it. Technically, at age 21 or 18 even, we are considered adults, grown ups. We no longer talk in hypotheticals about our futures, we talk in majors and graduation dates. We drink alcohol (legally), vote (as soon as we register...getting on that ASAP), we buy cigarettes, watch porn, join the army, and have horizontal drivers licences. But are we really 'real people'? For the most part, many of us are still driving our parent's or a family car with that shiny new sideways licence, drinking in the family basement, or using our parents Internet. We're caught in that awkward stage that Brittney Spears knows so well, not a girl, not yet a woman. We aren't anywhere near self-sufficient, functioning people with rich, diverse life experience, but we also aren't those lanky, acne-ridden, prom-going high school kids either. Basically we're grown ups who haven't entered the real world yet, and, as such you'll hear us refer to a great fear of becoming 'real people' in a few short years (I'm not going to dwell on this sentence, it'll send me spiraling into a panic attack). Anyway, a wonderful group of kiddles and I we were trying to verbalize this concept as we chillaxed in Mrs. Bieber's basement the other night (ohhhh yeah, another nickname. know who you are??). We tried, semi-jokingly, to place various groups of people on the 'real person' scale as an explanation for exactly what the term means. I guess our conclusion was basically when you're out on your own, fending for yourself, living on your own, paying for your own cheerios and ramen, and living in the real, post-college world, that's when you really become a real person. Contrary to what you might think you are right now (for anyone pre-college graduation reading this, anyway) you are not real. You're a floater, a drifter, a figment of the world's imagination.
Anyway, in order to more clearly illustrate what we were saying we tried various groups and evaluated their
membership to the real world. Below is the product of our discussion.

NOTES:

• I really take no issue with Canadians as a whole. hell, they gave us Ryan Reynolds! however, I do tend to use them as the butt of jokes mostly because they, like the French, are really quite good at being joke-butts. Also, as per request from Mrs. Bieber, JBiebs is excluded from this grouping. Mostly because he got a freakin BET award. Damn kid, teach me how to dougie! (not a sexual innuendo, apparently he can dougie really well!)
• fetus is loosely used, if you prefer 'moment of conception' 'embryo' or 'infant' you can substitute them here accordingly, whenever you believe life begins...
• Down there with 'real housewives' are heiresses and college students who transition directly into marrying a rich spouse and tanning all day for the rest of their lives. Also reality TV stars (YES SNOOKIE I MEAN YOU)
• There is no category for 'millionaires' or even rich people in general, because as discussed at length, raising your children well in a wealthy family can keep them very grounded and hardworking. And self-made millionaires are obviously good enough to get there....
• The one that was difficult to place was inmates. I haven't decided if they should be very high or very low on the scale. Because on the one hand, some real shit has happened in their lives, on the other they might not be the brightest tools in the shed. Like rich people, they must be examined on a case-by-case basis for realness.
• In regards to the last one: click here. Kicking someones head off is as real as it gets.
• Before college, high school students experience a sudden drop in realness, also called 'senioritis' It's a beautiful thing.

Want To See Something Amazing?!

Yes, it's another video, but this one's totally worth taking a look at. It's an amazing project modeled after Dove's Real Beauty Campaign and is going on right here on campus, fronted by my amazing roommate and starring my other amazing roommate (props to Diva and Salad <3<3<3 Treenie and I are heading PR lol. Drape we miss ya!). Like I said, worth a gander kids!

LOL

Videos thanks to T.eam R.ocket <3 Because be honest, who doesn't love animal videos?

Ways To Procrastinate on Homework

As requested by JJ

WHAT TO DO INSTEAD OF HOMEWORK

• Read this blog (congratulations! One item done!)
• Write this blog (I mean, this ones mostly me, but I always welcome guest submissions!)
• Cure cancer
• Watch Youtube videos
• Catch up on Family Guy on Hulu
• Clean something (this might just be me again...)
• Draw a picture
• Go to the gym (in extreme circumstances only)
• Learn piano (tryinggggg)
• Play sporcle
• Learn the countries of the world alphabetically
• Practice the alphabet backwards, both for skill and sobriety tests
• Play Portal (FOR REAL PLAY IT)
• Play tetris
• Find an awesome recipe and make it/make plans to make it
• Order Sugar Bowl (AKA food)
• Make a stack of all the green things in your room
• Download music
• Creep on people on facebook
• Plan your next roadtrip
• Bake
• Alphabetize your DVDs
• Eat cookies
• Log onto public computers and change their background
• Eat more cookies
• Watch old 90s cartoons
• Clean the mud that has gathered on all your shoes cause it never stops raining
• Read texts from last night/dear blank please blank
• Write a story
• Go to the library and find the comic books (hint: look between "the joys of yiddish" and "french literature" that's where ours are?)
• Watch acapella groups sing songs (OMG SO GREAT)
• Decorate your room
• Recycle
• Tie all your roommates shoes together
• Sleep
• Kill zombies
• Clean out your facebook friends and/or cell phone contacts
• Plan your outfits for the rest of the week
• Drink (WATER!! WATER!! :])
• Go shopping
• Stargaze
• Go shopping again
• Doodle on every marker board in your hallway, and some that aren't in your hallway
• Stomp in puddles

College According to the Diva

This is all you need for college, according to my lovely roommate.

• Bed
• Pencil
• Rainboots
• ID/Meal Plan/Food

Ugh I Hate Slow Internet

So, I've spent the last hour and a half watching a 25 minutes waiting for my computer to buffer a 35 minute Family Guy episode. During that time I've cleaned my room, twice, adequately prepared myself for my math test tomorrow, emptied the recyclables, watered the plants, made several To Do lists, cleaned out the fridge - again - read all of the newest Texts from Last Night and DBPBs, posted them on friends walls, and playing numerous games of Tetris. So, I figured the next logical non-productive thing to do with my life is to write a new blog post, because I hadn't realized I haven't posted in almost a week. My bad. But I posted a lot last week, so I don't feel too badly for you, dearest readers. Oh, speaking of which (yes, I mean speaking of YOU, lovely audience!) I've been meaning to thank you all ever so much for your lovely support. It is because of you that this month has been the first month since the beginning of this blog with more page views than the month before (because I've recently discovered Blogger's statistics feature, so I can tell)!! Which, you may see as a sad accomplishment, but basically there's a pretty steady amount of views each month, which I'm overjoyed with - let me assure you. But not even done February - the shortest of the months, might I point out - and you, you fabulous terrific, short-attention-spanned people, have risen above and beyond January's expectations! And, as usual as a thank you, here are two of my favorite viral videos (and you all know by now what a viral-video junkie I am...). Although according to a survey done by, well, whoever does these type of surveys, the word 'viral' was the most overused in 2010 and the surveyors begged it be taken out of conversation along with 'epic' and 'fail' and any combination of the two.

Screw that. Here are two examples of non EPIC FAIL VIRAL videos!


omg if you don't crack a smile you don't have a soul (note to self, edit old post about quailifications for not having a soul)


This video's been around since 2006 but I recently re-discovered this as I sought ways to express my newfound love for acapella music (thanks Darren Criss and the Warblers - for holding Glee to a higher, less instrumental standard!)

Oh, and for those of you wondering, Family Guy still hasn't buffered.
I HATE DORM INTERNET! Sporcle here I come...

HOLY SITH!

I literally did not stop smiling for the whole four minutes and twenty three seconds. Talk about production quality.


Unfortunately, they only have one other video, and it's based on the game Half Life 2, but it's completely worth checking out even if you have no idea what's going on, for the sheer production quality (though it helps if you know what's going on....) and because Shephard's a hottie (when he picked up that crowbar at 8:28, my heart skipped a beat).

If Lady Gaga Ruled the World

• Casual Fridays would be replaced to Wear-Whats-In-Your-Cubicle Fridays
• Hand sanitizer dispensers would be filled with glitter
• High heeled sneakers would be gym class uniforms
• Madonna would be her top advisor
• The GAP would be out of business
• The armed forces would always be shirtless (good call on this one Mama M)
• We would need Intolerance Week in schools as a change of pace
• Casually bursting into flames would be the norm
• Pants would always be optional
• All legislature would be signed in glitter gel pen
• Heels would have minimum height requirements
• Disco balls and rhinestones would be church attire
• Prostitutes would wear business suits
• Everyone would know how to read, write, and play piano
• Jeans would go extinct
• It would half to always be sunny so we could rock our sunglasses
• Ashtrays would overflow with lipstick
• Sequins would litter the streets
• Your outfit might also be your lunch
• Every establishment would turn into a dance club at night

Lahve Lahve Lahve